Kara Hood

Message No. 2 of 11

Still connecting

After 10 years I have returned to Camp Stella Maris. I returned to be able to share in the joy of camp, to be able to touch the lives of campers and counselors as the spiritual director, but mostly I came back because of Kara. I wanted to return to a place where we had connected so deeply. Where our relationship grew beyond that of brother and sister into a deep friendship and respect. I wanted to return to a place where we had laughed and cried together, windsurfed together, and shared so much. I returned to CSM to seek the deep personal and spiritual connection we found there, and also to laugh once again. I knew I would find Kara's presence lingering there. I knew to look for her initials on the horse block, for her pictures in the chapel and coop, and for her signature in the boathouse. But there are so many places that I am surprised by her presence still. I went windsurfing for the first time in probably five years on Monday, July 15th, the 18 month anniversary of Kara's death. As I picked up speed catching the first gust of wind I almost dropped the sail as the memories flooded over me. Just the sound of the waves slapping against the board, the bubbles in my wake, the feel of the wind in my sail and on my back... it was like discovering a forgotten note Kara had written to me years ago. As deeply as I have felt Kara's presence at CSM, I have felt her absence deeply as well. It is painful to be back at camp without Kara as much as it is wonderful to still feel connected to her. "The presence of her absence is everywhere". I have dedicated my summer to Kara, and I trust that through me she is still touching hearts and changing lives. I have also made it a point to throw Kool Aid mix on counselors while they are in the shower, and dump buckets of water on their heads as they walk by Chandler, and other forms of fun "trashing" to be sure that I am making Kara proud and keeping people laughing. But I still can't get past the feeling that Kara should be coming back to work "H" week, or coming up for a mass or prime time. I know she is there with me all the time, but my heart longs for more.

Chris Hood Chris Hood

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Still connecting
	After 10 years I have returned to Camp Stella Maris. I returned to be able to share in the joy of camp, to be able to touch the lives of campers and counselors as the spiritual director, but mostly I came back because of Kara. I wanted to return to a place where we had connected so deeply. Where our relationship grew beyond that of brother and sister into a deep friendship and respect. I wanted to return to a place where we had laughed and cried together, windsurfed together, and shared so much. I returned to CSM to seek the deep personal and spiritual connection we found there, and also to laugh once again. I knew I would find Kara's presence lingering there. I knew to look for her initials on the horse block, for her pictures in the chapel and coop, and for her signature in the boathouse. But there are so many places that I am surprised by her presence still. I went windsurfing for the first time in probably five years on Monday, July 15th, the 18 month anniversary of Kara's death. As I picked up speed catching the first gust of wind I almost dropped the sail as the memories flooded over me. Just the sound of the waves slapping against the board, the bubbles in my wake, the feel of the wind in my sail and on my back... it was like discovering a forgotten note Kara had written to me years ago. As deeply as I have felt Kara's presence at CSM, I have felt her absence deeply as well. It is painful to be back at camp without Kara as much as it is wonderful to still feel connected to her. "The presence of her absence is everywhere". I have dedicated my summer to Kara, and I trust that through me she is still touching hearts and changing lives. I have also made it a point to throw Kool Aid mix on counselors while they are in the shower, and dump buckets of water on their heads as they walk by Chandler, and other forms of fun "trashing" to be sure that I am making Kara proud and keeping people laughing. But I still can't get past the feeling that Kara should be coming back to work "H" week, or coming up for a mass or prime time. I know she is there with me all the time, but my heart longs for more.
	Chris Hood Chris Hood